Fear

Hello one and all! Apologies if you've been eagerly awaiting blog updates (I'm sure you probably haven't been) but I've been quite busy for a change!

So, I think the last time I was with you, I was just about to start working at Thorpe Park for Fright Nights. If you're unaware what this is, basically around the time of Halloween, theme parks all over get a bit creepy and people come along and pay to have their pants scared off.

I was at Thorpe Park in Surrey, which was in connection with Lionsgate Films, so all of our scare mazes were themed as their films. We had Saw, the Blair With Project, The Cabin in The Woods, You're Next and My Bloody Valentine. I was in The Cabin in The Woods and I had the best fun ever!

Unfortunately I can't tell you much about it, as I signed a contract about putting stuff on the internet, plus the mazes are going to be used again for the next two years and I wouldn't want to spoil it for anyone if you go!

I wasn't sure whether I would like the job or not, I'd never done scare acting before and I had my usual nerves about being found out as a fraud and getting sacked on my first day! I was still nervous during rehearsals, everyone seemed to be throwing themselves into with gusto and I felt like I didn't belong. I'm the funny one, I don't do scary!

I was really lucky in my maze as every day I got to play a different character, our maze had lots of different zones and if you've seen the film, you know that there are a lot of characters! This meant I got to learn (and make up) lots of different scare tactics... Even though my favourite was hiding behind doors or in dark corners and jumping out at people!

I never though that I'd get such a buzz from scaring people! People's reactions were hilarious. There was the natural reaction of screaming, the painful reaction of striking out and hitting me, the unbelievable reaction of people actually falling to the floor in terror, and on my first weekend, a Chinese man putting his hand in my mouth...

The people I worked with in my maze were fabulous too, we had such a mix of people but they were all brilliant! We were spaced quite close to each other in the maze so we got to scare with each other, and we were able to strike the fear into people as a group which was fabulous. I'm glad I wasn't a guest coming through, as facing a group of zombies on my own would have creeped me out, and I know all of the techniques now!

I stayed in a hotel when I was working there, and despite its budget nature the job made it worth it. I'd love to go back next year if they'll have me. Scaring might be my new favourite thing!

However, the fear that I made people experience is nothing compared to the fear I'm feeling at the moment. As I write this there are only eleven days until I fly out to the USA to perform! In eighteen days time I'll be doing my first performance!

Most of the time I feel okay about it, and I'm very excited to be visiting there for the first time, but every know and then I think about the fact that I'm going out there to do a play by myself and I get absolutely terrified. My nerves are so bad that I've been feeling sick. I've never been that bad! I think it's because I'm in a different country, if I was doing it over here I'd be fine.

But what if the Americans think I'm terrible? What if they don't understand a word I'm saying due to my horrible Kettering accent that's fought its way back?!? What if they hate it? The man who's in charge of it over there emailed me on Friday to give me some info, and he told me that he's a huge Alan Bennett fan... what if I ruin it for him?? I'm terrified!

There are a few others performing too, but from what I've gathered they've been doing their shows for years so theirs are going to be fabulous. I'm just a girl from Kettering who's done a few rehearsals and hoping for the best!

I'm sure I'll be fine once I get there but for now I'm just sitting here in a panic, eek!

I promise I'll be back here before I go, but for now I'm going to sit in a corner with my script!

Nxxx